Spiritual teacher Teal Swan, the self-proclaimed, “Leader of an Authenticity Movement”, reveals herself as not the self-aware and authentic person she claims to be. Included on this page are blogs Teal has written about people without their consent. Some of the blogs she was pressured to remove, and others are still published (all private information is redacted). It’s sad to say that the following excerpts are just examples; her videos are not included. Also included, are Teal’s satanic ritual abuse story blogs that she removed due to (we suspect), being questioned about the discrepancies of her story.
Teal uses her public platform to air her personal grievances, and labels it as being “authentic”, while claiming that people who want privacy are “perpetuat[ing] shame”:
Privacy, when it is done to hide aspects of your life from view is a painful state that perpetuates shame. [source]
This behavior creates an unfair power dynamic between her and the people she writes about. Teal ensures she publicly tells her side of the story first, publicizes it, and relies on her followers for their biased support. By Teal garnering sympathy from her followers, some feel inclined to harass or pursue the people Teal has unfavorably mentioned in her blogs, despite them only knowing Teal’s skewed version of events. Teal takes her idea of “authenticity” further, by stating, if she is censored, it “causes [her] pain”:
There are steps that I have taken to reduce the threat to them [people Teal writes about] and honor their anonymity as much as I can without silencing myself, which causes me pain. [source]
This is blatant manipulation. The following excerpts are pulled from Teal’s blogs for public viewing. Again, all private information is redacted.
I couldn’t continue to call myself Teal if I did not push that bright red shiny button
Out of respect for the victims of Teal (her parents), the full blog stays in the graveyard. It is completely understandable why it was removed as it is particularly egregious. It’s enough to make anyone feel grossed out. Willing to bet, Teal’s parents fell off their chairs when they read it. Teal starts off the blog with “And yes, it is bound to seriously turn some heads! The very subject makes people highly uncomfortable. And I couldn’t continue to call myself Teal if I did not push that bright red shiny button.” Did Teal write this blog for shock value at the expense of her parents? The following excerpt is just the warm-up to her topic, without going into detail. It is an example of Teal’s disregard for others — it is all about her, and her “perspective”. This is just one of numerous examples of Teal steam-rolling her parents:
“I will present my own perspective relative to my childhood relationship with my parents. It is important to understand that your perspective is all that matters when it comes to healing because other peoples [sic] perspectives don’t shape your reality, only yours does. My character development and my personality and my emotional state is all a result of one thing: My perspective. It doesn’t ultimately matter if anyone does or does not agree with me. It does not matter what the truth is, because truth is subjective. My truth sets up my experience, so it is all we should address when trying to heal. I can tell you that what is to follow is NOT my parent’s perspective. In fact the most painful thing to all of us in my family, is that our perspectives do not match up. My parents are hurt over and over by the fact that I portray them as bad parents, given how much they ‘loved me’ and given how much effort they consciously put into parenting. They are especially hurt that I give them no choice to ‘air their dirty laundry’.” [Blog staying private]
Call me crazy, but it never occurred to me that any of them [family] would read the post
And this blog is the fallout from the blog above. In Teal’s mind, it is perfectly okay to write about something extremely disrespectful, because she thinks the chances are low that the people she wrote about, will see it. She also talks about her suffering, her pain, and her anger. There is absolutely no remorse, and empathy for those she hurt. It is all about her.
“My parents were especially hurt this week when they saw my post about [redacted]. In truth, I cannot conceive of any parent seeing that and not being hurt by it. I wrote that post because this blog is my own personal healing outlet. This blog is also a way for me to use my own life as an example of [sic] healing process in the hopes that it will help others who relate to it, to heal. But today, I am suffering because that post has damaged my already frail relationship with my parents and brother even further. Call me crazy, but it never occurred to me that any of them would read the post. In fact, they wouldn’t have read it (because they do not follow my career) had their friends not sent it to them. And it never occurred to me that their friends would read my blog entries, given that they tend to relate with my parents and my brother and not with me. So, today I’m going to be candid about where I am right now relative to all of this. I’m going to go to the level of pain and vulnerability instead of anger, which is what the anger is really about.” [Blog staying private]
Largest manifestation of my scapegoat wound
Teal was ordered to remove the blog by an attorney as Teal wrote about a family that included children, without their consent. One would think she would know not to do this, but in Teal’s world, there are no boundaries. This is an example of Teal believing she is being authentic, while positioning herself as a victim, at the expense of others. Can you imagine growing up, and realizing someone wrote about you when you were a child and it was about an unpleasant situation? Teal doesn’t think about those things. Here is an excerpt, albeit redacted and vague, but it clearly shows how Teal manipulates her followers to believe she is the victim. Note: the blog was ordered to be removed by an attorney. This following excerpt is from a blog that was ordered to be removed by an attorney. It is approved to share on this page.
“Believe it or not, this situation I’m in with this new hater pales in comparison to what happened yesterday . . . And to our dismay, the entire day was about… Me. . . . With the help of my haters, and all the information that is now public about my own childhood . . . It is probably the largest manifestation of my ‘scapegoat’ wound that I’ve ever encountered. Rest assured, I am working actively to try to integrate this wound. I am aware of where it comes from and what is unhealed within me that keeps mirroring in this way. But because healing is a process, I cannot guarantee this will immediately stop. I’m thinking that I need to just become used to the attacks and the uprising of haters. The controversy and resistance around me seems to be so large and aggressive that I cannot do anything to control it.”
Teal goes onto say how her boundaries were crossed as a child, but she has no qualms, crossing boundaries by writing about someone without their consent in the same blog. Hypocrisy? She states:
“For some of us, there were big consequences when the people in our early lives disapproved of us. Our boundaries were violated.”
Instead of Teal apologizing to the person she wrote about, she published the blog, “Beyond What Is Right is What Is Real” a month later, claiming that she does not disclose identifying information about people in her blogs. But she did. She included the person’s name. She also manages to slip in how privacy causes her pain:
“There are steps that I have taken to reduce the threat to them [people Teal writes about] and honor their anonymity as much as I can without silencing myself, which causes me pain. For example, I don’t use their names unless they specifically tell me I can.”
She goes onto to justify her behavior by stating that the people she writes about are merely characters in her stories
“But people really worry when they appear as a part in my journals that they have lost anonymity. They become extremely reactive as if they have been exposed. But it is not the case. No one really cares who the characters lending to the story really are. It isn’t personal. They care about the story. But the people who appear as part of the journals care. They care because unlike everyone else, they know who they are. So they’ve lost personal anonymity. Meaning they are anonymous to everyone except themselves.”
In the end all, be all, the real people Teal writes about in her blogs, are merely characters in her stories.
Egregious false accusation made by Ale Gicqueau / Teal
After Teal’s third husband realized she would not respect his request for privacy throughout their marriage, and more bad behavior, he left Teal for his home country during Spring of 2015. Over the course of a year, Teal inappropriately referenced him throughout her media that included “lies, half truths, manipulations, exaggerations and embellishments”. Over a year and half later, the ex emailed Teal and requested her to come clean with the public about him in a blog, and if she did not publish a blog, he would have to do it for her. Since Teal has a difficult time respecting others, she did not write a blog – which forced the ex to do it for her.
In that same email request to come clean with the public, he confirmed an in-person meeting with her that they both agreed upon. The ex stated in the email, “Myself and ‘J’ are planning to see you . . .”. The person the ex was referring to, was a mutual friend of theirs, and Teal knew this. Then Teal’s current husband, Ale, published a blog that included the ex’s private email, but he edited it, and inserted the false statement highlighted in yellow below. Not only did Ale write an disparaging blog, Teal published the email in her Facebook group, Teal Tribe.
By Teal and Ale publishing the email in Teal Tribe, they manipulated her following to be outraged (cult behavior). The following screenshot is from Teal Swan’s Facebook group, Teal Tribe. It is an [example] of some of the commentary being posted in the group.
He pulled out his gun and put it to my temple- bullet missed
This is one of Teal’s far-fetched blogs that she removed. According to her blog, “Red Flags”, she had a boyfriend put a gun to her temple, pulled the trigger, but the bullet missed and hit the wall. Why haven’t we heard of this boyfriend since she published this blog in November 2013? This would be a memorable experience, right?
“Nine years ago, I had an ex boyfriend who took Ambien, and went into a deranged rage spiral. When I tried to stop him, he chased me into the street (the neighbors saw and called the cops). He then proceeded to knock me out and drug [sic] me by my feet down the stairs of the house. His father watched him do all of this, (he followed him yelling). Anyway, he pulled out his gun and put it to my temple and when he pulled the trigger, the bullet somehow miraculously went into the wall instead of my head.” [Blog exposed]
Who like Fallon, is also a psychopath
Teal’s idea of authenticity is diagnosing her boyfriend, “Fallon” as a psychopath, and publishing it for the World Wide Web to read in her blog, “The Bigger Picture”. She takes her lack of ethics even further by including a photo of him, and writing about his family’s personal issues. Teal claims to be a therapist, yet lacks even a basic understanding of confidentiality. But, her followers believe she is “better than” educated professionals. What would happen if Teal crossed the line with her followers personally? Would they still justify her behavior? “Fallon” is a not his real name, it was the name Teal assigned him while he was living with her. Teal reassigning him a new name, is essentially taking ownership of someone – this is a classic cult leader trait.
“I went out to see the bigger picture of the purpose for this situation between Fallon and myself. After coming back, I can clearly see my vibrational match for Fallon. And how he is a match for me. And after much deliberation, I’ve found it! We both suffer from monophobia; and this is a reincarnation of my childhood abuser, who like Fallon, is also a psychopath.”[Blog exposed]
Fallon wrote a blog about Teal – it was a heartfelt blog about his experiences of being in two cults. His blog ended up being an unintentional exposé about Teal when he slipped in that the “matriarch” of the “alien cult” told him that he “should go and kill myself”. The blog was published for a short time. He took it down for peace and privacy. Read excerpt here. Side note: Teal believes she is a “Soul Fork Arcturian Extraterrestrial” inhabiting a human body.
Teal thinks she believes in freedom of self-expression
In Teal’s world, you cannot question her, and if you do, she thinks it’s slander. A former “Intentional Community” member exposed Teal by publishing a website. Within a year, Teal published the blog, “The Authenticity Movement” and in it, she mentioned the woman by name. Teal states that she “supports freedom of expression” and that she would even go so far as to support people who spoke out against her. Teal crossed the line by identifying her, and the real kicker is Teal is a hypocrite. Teal’s sidekick, Blake Dyer, posted in Teal Tribe, “any lawyers in the house?”, seeking help to sue the woman for publishing the website [screenshot].
“Here’s the thing, when I see the things my ‘haters’ say and write about me it causes me immense pain. A lot of it is slander (total untruth). But regardless of whether or not my perspective is that it is untrue, a lot of what they express is their personal experiences with how they perceive me from their point of view. I do not hold a double standard for censorship. I do not want the freedom of expression for myself and want to prohibit others from that same freedom. I do not let people post hateful things on my own web site and forums. That is not self-loving for me to do. But I WANT them to retain the right to do that on neutral turf and on their own turf. [Name redacted] (one of the people who I feel betrayed me the most by publicly turning from avid fan to hater) says things that hurt me immensely and that are false. But make no mistake, if she were in court defending her right to be able to say those things on her own turf because they are an authentic expression of herself, I would literally show up in court on her side with all of my lawyers in tow to defend her right to do that. That is how strongly I believe in the freedom of self-expression.” [Blog still published] Redacted information.
Teal trashes Korean Spa, while making blatant racist remarks with her white privilege
Teal visited a Korean Spa and wrote a scathing blog about the spa itself and the staff who worked there. Teal decided to make use of her blog to write a viscous review, which appallingly, is crammed with her customary ignorant stereotyping and racism. What was it that kindled Teal’s wrath? Perhaps it was her own prejudices —she needlessly uses the words “Asian(s)” and “Korean” eleven times in the short excerpt below. Or perhaps she had expected to be treated like the “Queen [of] Sheba” (the nickname her parents gave her as a child), and was enraged when she was treated like any other customer. We don’t know, because, as always, we only have Teal’s word to go on. Whatever the cause of her fury, she went the extra mile to ensure readers were fully aware of the spa she was referring to, by including their business name, location, a link to their website and two photos. It’s very clear from the blog, that Teal had a personal vendetta against the spa and staff, and was seeking revenge by attempting to damage the reputation of their business. And all this from a so-called spiritual leader.
Stephanie Fleitas took me to a Korean Spa last night called JeJu. It was one of the most dichotomous experiences I’ve had in a long time. Driving up, the building and the lobby triggered me because it looked like a whorehouse, complete with neon lights, impatient older Asian women and the smell of cigarette smoke…a scrub area which is comprised to [sic] two rows of white rubber tables where women lay completely naked to be scrubbed head to foot by older Asian women, who are wearing only bras, panties and scrubber gloves that strip every dead skin cell from your form. It is ironic that one would think bathhouses were all about hygiene maintenance, but it has been my observation that Asian bathhouses boast some of the lowest hygiene levels of any public health service. . . .
Stephanie and I removed our clothes and upon entering the bathhouse, the immediate impression I had was that I was entering a harem. The place was littered with women and at 11:00 pm no less as most Korean spas are open 24 hours a day. . . .
Stephanie and I both elected to get scrubbed down. Admittedly, I felt a bit like a cow. They washed our bodies with dish soap. Asian businesses based around beauty have not yet embraced the idea of organics. They washed our bodies with dish soap. I have sensitive skin and so it hurt like hell and “softer” doesn’t really mean anything to a washing woman who speaks no English. I’ve decided that the least relaxing thing on earth, is being ordered around by older angry Korean ladies. Asians in general are not gentle with bodies. . . .
While we were there, we went into the part of the spa called the “common area” where both men and women are allowed to comingle [sic]. And it felt exactly like a cultish commune. . . .
The awesome healing properties of the rooms are offset by the dizzy-money making design of the place and the mentality of the Asian body workers in general. In contrast, there is a brightly colored, tacky Korean fast food restaurant with people seated at the table consuming unhealthy food with chopsticks. . . . I’m telling you, if they replaced the Korean fast-food restaurant with a raw vegan café, replaced the shampoos and scrubs with organic soaps, explained to the bathing women the meaning of “soothing” and took the neon prostitute type signs down, it would be a paradise for new age/spiritual demographic. I’m secretly hoping someone who reads this blog, goes to try it out just so that they can catch a glimpse of the mysterious 24-hour surrealist reality I’m describing. [Teal include’s the spa’s Web address] [Blog staying private out of respect for the business]
Cement walls scraping into your naked skin is welcome, because at least it is touch
In Teal’s poetic glory, she describes in full detail, how she was thrown into a basement naked in her blog, “A Flame That Flickers”. Teal often mentions [alleged] pseudoseizures due to her [alleged] ritual abuse, that are triggered by persons, places and things. So, one has to wonder how could she even be writing about this morbid story to begin with. Is she lying to her readers about her ritual abuse story altogether?
My wrists tied to my ankles with a pair of fraying horse hobbles. I didn’t know how long I would be closed in down there. I did not know if I would be killed. No sound except the occasional jolt of footsteps on the floor above me. When the pitch black closes in around you; all directions are lost. My being was drowning in the familiarity of the feeling of being back in that isolated emotional well of despair. The fear of that soul engrossing powerlessness is so great, that the body succumbs to it and the numbness consumes you. It is a prison so air tight, that it drives you within yourself, towards the spaciousness of the world within yourself and within your imagination. The sensation of the cement walls scraping into your naked skin is welcome, because at least it is touch. In the absence of human warmth, at least they brutally hold you.” [Blog exposed]
He has discovered just how lost and without a sense of personal identity he really is
Teal informs her followers about how messed up her boyfriend is, and how much he needs to get help in her blog, “Post Trauma Tranquility”. Suddenly, it becomes the world against the boyfriend. Could you imagine what it would happen if a devotee of Teal bumped into him? In Teal’s mind, it’s okay because apparently others’ wellbeing does not matter.
“This has been by far the most radical healing cycle I have experienced in years. . . .He has discovered just how lost and without a sense of personal identity he really is. We had a good conversation before the distance grew between us. It is obvious that this was not a failure. Him leaving this community was the best thing for his expansion as well as mine. He has been seeing therapists and has been digging into the root of his problem. Last night, he held a ‘Is Teal Scott a scam’ Google hang out. Someone called the police thinking that Fallon was at my house and that I was in danger. They came to my house and took down a report. On one hand, cops trigger me because the cult I grew up in told me that if I ever told anyone about any of the secret things I saw, the police would be coming after me to put me in jail. On the other hand, some part of my childhood pain found solace last night. I felt loved and safer because someone cared enough about my well being to take action. The adults in my childhood. never took action to keep me safe, so it felt like a healing experience. I was in shock that someone could care about me that much.” [Blog exposed] Other non-related content redacted for persons’ privacy.
I delivered twins out onto the snow
In Teal’s blog, “Straight Lines”, she claims that her [alleged] abuser administered oxytocin to induce labor, and that she “was in so much pain that [her] vision was distorting.” She then drove to a canyon and gave birth to not just one fetus, but two. How did Teal drive if her vision was impaired? She would have required medical attention, but didn’t go to a hospital. Also, if Teal was in the 2nd trimester of a twin pregnancy, how did her parents not notice, both symptomatically and physically? Teal is a trim woman, she would have shown a twin pregnancy.
“He injected me with oxytocin, which put me into pre term labor a few hours later and left me at my apartment. I stood up to look in the mirror and blood streamed down my legs onto the bathroom Soor[sic]. I cleaned it up with paper towels. I was in so much pain that my vision was distorting. I knew that I couldn’t go to the hospital. I had no insurance and I was afraid of the repercussions from my abuser (if he were to Stand out). So I put on my jacket, put newspaper over the seat of my car and drove myself to a nearby canyon. I got out of my car and wandered out into the snow. Labor puts women into a ‘zone’ of surrealism. I sat there by myself in the dark, bleeding out into the snow for so long that my arms and feet turned white. I delivered twins out onto the snow.” [Blog exposed]
Teal / Ale Gicqueau, published extremely inappropriate blog about Teal’s third husband.
By far, Ale’s blog, “Please Go In Peace”, surpasses most of Teal/Ale’s blogs, as one of the most significant, boundary-crossing, and disrespectful blogs to date. If the rest of the blogs are not proof enough that Teal is not what she claims to be (Self Help Expert etc.), this one should. After numerous requests for Teal to leave him alone, and to not share private matters to the public during, and after their marriage, she continued to do so. In response, he felt the need to clear up the “half truths, lies and misleading versions of reality” that she publicly spoke of in an eight-page blog (he’s since removed the blog). In response, Teal’s fourth husband wrote an extremely inappropriate and judgmental twelve-page blog that far-surpassed anything the third husband wrote… ever. This following excerpt pales in comparison to the rest of Ale’s blog.
One of their biggest struggles as a couple was around the concept of privacy and openness. In my experience, people who are obsessed about privacy are the ones that are fixated by the image they want to project onto others. . . . It is a deep insecurity that is fueled by a personal sense of inadequacy, and it manifests into the desire to control all the information going to the public. With Teal leading a movement on authenticity, these two could not have been more incompatible. [Blog staying private]
Teal trashes the entire city of London, makes gross generalizations, and then burned bridges
Teal builds London up and then shreds it with her dizzy-making blog. Does she love it or hate it? All the while, she disrespects and generalizes her British “Tealer” devotees. It’s unfortunate that Teal’s blog, “Pride and Prejudice” is still published. Teal states, “Within society, there is a ‘suckling on the milk of social status’. Everyone seems so keen to jockey for rank over someone.” A hypocritical statement from Teal as she constantly seeks high rank, by having an exhaustive list of exalted titles and presenting herself as a “eucharist”. The result of Teal’s bad behavior, is that a CEO of [redacted], wanted to dump her from an event, but couldn’t due to a contract being signed. In Teal’s “eye-rolling” fashion, she goes onto exalting herself as an authority of the human condition in her blog.
London is the most unfriendly city I’ve yet been to in the world. Like any extreme environment, it has bred the opposition. . . . the air, like the rest of London quite frankly, was full of the confetti of pretense. . . . Pretense is the dysfunction of Great Britain. I have never loved the straightforward, tactlessness of Americans so much as I do today. It is like a breath of fresh air. . . . In Great Britain, you can never escape your stars. If you are born poor, you are always seen as low class, no matter how much success you might see. . . . The British in general, are obsessed with and addicted to importance. They resist unimportance. And so, because all things that we resist persist, the British people feel more unimportant within their own society and Great Britain is only becoming more and more unimportant in the world. . . . Because it was only upon coming here that I understood just how much dysfunction there is in a class concerned society; and how much damage it does to a person’s soul. In Great Britain, there is an attitude of ‘it can’t be done’. [Blog still published]
To spare you the graphic details…
But Teal went into graphic details anyway. Again, if she were so traumatized, how could she write about such traumatic experiences in gruesome detail? The following excerpt is from her old bio that was published on her site, somewhere between the years of 2014-2017. Her current bio stays very far away from any mentions of her [alleged] ritual abuse.
“To spare you the graphic details, from age six to nineteen I was tortured physically and sexually in cult rituals. I was raped, deprived of food and forced to undergo three abortions (all fathered and aborted by Doc himself). I was photographed for sadomasochistic pornography, sold to men for sex out of outdoor gas station bathrooms, kept in basements and in a hole in the ground in Doc’s back yard. I was exposed to electro-shock programming, forced to undergo isolation torture and left overnight tied up in lava caves in southern Idaho. I was drugged chronically by Doc with anesthetics (all of which he had unlimited access to due to being a vet by trade). I was chased through the Idaho and Utah wilderness by Doc “playing” tracking games in which he would hunt me, and I would undergo consequences (like having my rib cage cut or being raped) if I was caught. And I was used as a lure to other children that ended up being hurt and on occasion killed.” [Bio exposed]
Children as a subject of Teal’s victimhood, contained in her blog formula
This statement that Teal made in her blog, “The Alchemy of Fear and Love” is a perfect example of how she builds her blogs. But what makes this blog stand out, is that she writes about a family that includes children, and actually believes she is a victim of them. This takes her bad behavior to a whole new level of boundary-crossing. In Teal’s world, it does not matter how these children will feel as adults when they inevitably do their own research on her when they get older. And here is Teal’s (dysfunctional) blog formula:
1) She presents herself as the victim – that she plays no part in the failure of the relationship (while also seeking to fill her empty well with narcissistic supply, pulled from her sympathetic followers);
2) She believes that she knows what humanity is thinking, feeling and believing (Teal perceives everyone as an extension of herself, but in reality it is her projection of her own thoughts, feelings and beliefs);
3) She gives advice to her followers (she presents herself as the authority figure on psychology, attempting to validate herself as the self-proclaimed “emotional expert”).
And now for her boundary-crossing statement:
“I have chosen a career where I attract a magnification of the same hatred I received as a child in a town where my entire being was an insult to the status quo. I have fallen in love with a man whose children have been taught to hate me by a woman who hates me even though we have never met. I overhear their conversations about me. I know that in a world as ignorant as this (which runs according to the clock of fear) the impression is that if people are polarized you have to choose to love one or the other. In a world as ignorant as this, love is perceived as a finite resource where giving to one, means taking away from another. At times I feel the appertaining rage at the absurdity of it all. But under that rage I find that I am really afraid.” [Blog exposed]
I am consumed with jealousy
Teal’s admitted jealousy in her blog, “Crime and Punishment”, reveals that she doesn’t take her own advice as a self- proclaimed “emotional expert”. Even more revealing, you would have thought that Teal would be empathetic and supportive towards fellow survivor, Elizabeth Smart. Given her career role and alleged abuse history, why isn’t she advocating for victims? Instead, she took to the “worldwide stage” to claim “celebrity” status, and fame. Is this the real reason she is jealous of Smart’s TV appearances, books, movie deals and “attention”?
“Just yesterday in the airport, I passed by Elizabeth Smart’s new book and I had this same reaction. First I feel like the unluckiest person on earth, then that emotion gives rise to rage and then I am consumed with jealousy. I watch them get re absorbed into society’s arms as heroes. No one questions or doubts their experiences. They don’t have to struggle for anything anymore. Their psychology is provided for them. So are book deals and movie deals, so they never have to struggle with the insecurity of money again. But my story is the more common one for those of us who have escaped. No book deals, no movie deals, no headline news articles.” [Blog exposed]
Rallies, Slander Strikes & Slander Campaigns
This excerpt takes victimhood to a whole new level. She opens up her blog by informing the reader how her followers are quite sympathetic to her as a “see, people love me” manipulation. Then, she moves into “happening to me” victimhood, dismissing others’ concerns. Teal goes onto making a false claim that there is a “rally” of people to “slander strike against [her]”. It was one person and a couple who dispute the source of the “Completion Process”. She makes another false claim that there were people causing “real problems for me on a physical level.” Drama. This following excerpt is from a blog that was ordered to be removed by an attorney. It is approved to share on this page.
“This morning when I woke up to make my way to the airport for the talk I am giving in Seattle, I was greeted by a stream of empathetic text messages from people close to me apologizing for what is currently happening to me. Every three months or so, I find myself at the helm of attack. One person or another surfaces and manages to rally people to create a slander strike against me. They build their case around previous slander campaigns. The problem with slander is that many people simply believe what they read. This time, as many of you have already heard, another ‘teacher’ has gone on the warpath demanding that I be stopped and demanding that her followers put a stop to me. They have managed to create real problems for me on a physical level this time as their harassment has extended to the people around me and also to the people who hire me to write books and give talks… But when it rains, it pours.” [Blog exposed] Non-related identifying information redacted for persons’ privacy.
Poster child for ritual abuse – position I was born to fill
In one of Teal’s earliest blogs, “The Liberty of Confession”, she claimed the title, “poster child for ritual abuse”, but in later years, conveniently dropped it once she was being questioned about the holes in her story. In her “Answering Allegations” video she complains about how she just wants to talk about her “teachings”. And let us not forget how she loves to be a “celebrity“.
As I was doing the interview, it became obvious to me that I am being set up to be a spokesperson and poster child for ritual abuse. When I think about it, I know it is a position I was born to fill. It is definitely a position, which will garner a lot of flack though. Controversy always garnishes stories of abuse. These things are rarely ever cut and dry. Those of us who do escape (like most victims of abuse), escape with little to no evidence, except the bent and broken parts of our personalities and lives. Our pain is the pain of having no witnesses. [Blog exposed]
Teal’s inappropriate and disrespectful reference
The screenshot below is from Teal’s blog, “Troth to Transparency”. It’s a passive-aggressive stab at her ex husband, who requested privacy and peace from Teal, post divorce, but she would not respect that request, while she “wanted to take his last name because…it fits in perfectly with [her] career path.” One would think that taking off with his last name would satisfy her enough. After being given much flack from her readers, she removed the photograph below from her blog and replaced it. [Blog exposed]
It must have been very difficult for Teal to be told what to do (change the image), so she found something similar to replace it: A man in a box for revised blog #2. Couldn’t it have been a kitten peeking out of a box?
Dodgy Financial Dealings
Not only are Teal’s financial dealings suspect, as she reveals in “I Changed My Mind”, it displays her exceptionally grandiose plans for her enterprise, Teal Eye LLC. According to her, it would be an “unstoppable monolith” that would replace multi billion dollar industries. Why did she remove the blog? Was it exposing her proven cult leader grandiosity?
“The temptation to make money would be greater than the temptation to stay in alignment with what Teal Eye was created for. So do the math here for a second, if no one was being paid out of the profit of Teal Eye, the passive income would do nothing but build up and be turned into another investment and build up and be turned into another investment and so on and so forth until it became one of the wealthiest companies in the world. But not just a company, it would become like its own entity. An unstoppable monolith that would come up against the corrupt multi billion dollar industries and not only compete with them, but replace them.” [Blog exposed]
Covers all the bases
Teal’s blog, “The Pain of Amber”, is loaded. She covers her victimhood in merely being questioned about her story (not debunking whether ritual abuse happens or not), goes into graphic detail about her (alleged) ritual abuse, and reminds her readers that it’s the grand satanic ritual abuse story that enables her to be “The Spiritual Catalyst” that she is. Everyone has heard this “overcome” narrative right? It’s the formula for being a speaker – author – new age spiritual teacher.
“Last night, I was a match to hearing that my most avid anti-Teal antagonist [redacted] has decided to go after my “allegations” of ritual abuse in order to try to make me look like a fraud by trying to prove that ritual abuse does not occur. At first, I was mildly irritated by the information. But that gave way too much deeper pain. I spent a while with my community members last night owning up to and expressing that pain. . . . I was forced to participate in bestiality and necrophilia, drugged by my abuser with Ketamine, Dormator, Xylazine, opiates, peyote and speed (all of which he had unlimited access to due to being a vet). I was chased through the Idaho and Utah wilderness by my abuser . . . On one hand it is obvious that I would not be doing the job I am doing today around the world if it wasn’t for this experience.” [Blog exposed]
Women feel so threatened by me
Teal oftentimes presents herself as a victim of women because she believes they perceive her as a threat to their security, due to her self-proclaimed dazzling beauty and success. Teal wrote about a former friend in her blog, “A Piece Of My Heart”, believing that this friend was threatened by her. Teal goes onto remind her devotees how righteous and important she is by mentioning her [alleged] “fame”. The former friend defended herself by writing a heartfelt blog titled,”Open Letter To Teal Swan”, addressing Teal’s false claims. As a result of the event and Teal’s disrespectful blog, the former friend, and her fiancé withdrew from her, and discontinued event management in their home country, and online interviews. Did Teal think ahead that she was burning bridges? The former friend has since removed her blog for peace and privacy, but has Teal removed “A Piece Of My Heart”? No.
“I felt that my presence created so much insecurity in her that I should just back off. But I ended up in tears in a vegan restaurant with my friend (her partner) re-living my wounds relative to women. I expressed to him how terrified I am that it would be just like every other situation like this in my life where a woman feels so threatened by me that they eventually make their partner choose between me and them. . . . When fame is a part of your life, you have people pulling at you every second of the day. It starts to feel like people try to take every single cell from you. There comes a point where you end up having to create boundaries for yourself just to keep yourself intact.” [Blog still published]
I kept running into other spiritual teachers who would commend me on my bravery- triangulation manipulation
Teal’s ex husband made it clear from the beginning of their marriage that he prefers privacy, but of course Teal blogs about him anyway, despite his request for her not to. Even worse, she triangulated other spiritual teachers against him by stating that they “commend [her] bravery” for being “authentic” in her efforts to try and validate her boundary-crossing behavior. Had these spiritual teachers known her passive aggressive stab at her ex, it is doubtful they would have supported her.
“I was married to a man who thought it did not serve me at all [Teal’s idea of authenticity]. It was a constant source of contention between us. He called me an exhibitionist and told me it was an embarrassing aspect of me. I had to keep everything related to my relationship with him private. I felt shamed for what I felt deep in every cell of my body was right. I kept running into other spiritual teachers who would commend me on my bravery.” [Blog still published]
My mother will most likely resent me for writing this blog
In Teal’s blog, “The Selfless Service Cord” she states that her mother will most like resent her for her blog, but she disrespectfully publishes it anyway. Teal often paints herself as a victim of her parents in her blogs and other media. She has disrespected and embarrassed them on an ongoing basis, and still does to this day. She teaches her followers that everyone has “mommy and daddy issues” – which only fuels the divide between families. She provides little to no support on how to strengthen familial bonds.
Consciously, my mother will most likely resent me for writing this blog about her. My family and I are not talking right now, in large part because I have decided to be public about every aspect of my life and they do not want to be talked about or written about at all. [Blog still published]
The Teal “is not perfect” escape hatch route
A former “Intentional Community” member confronted Teal by publishing a website about her because she was not heard. In response, Teal published the blog, “Great Expectations” and deflected, in order to not take responsibility for her behavior. She speaks for the person, and people in general, believing that she knows what they are thinking, feeling and believing (boundary crossing). She further deflects by stating that she’s a “real woman”, who is not perfect. Also, this blog is just another example of Teal writing about people without their consent. For anyone who has been following Teal, it doesn’t take a brain surgeon to figure out who she is writing about. Since Teal is the one with the following, she has a moral responsibility to show respect for people by, in the least, listening to their grievances, and owning up.
When people hold these expectations of me and I do not live up to them, they feel betrayed, disillusioned, disappointed, lost and often hateful. This is in fact the very reason that one of the members of my spiritual community left years ago to turn into one of my principal haters. And in relationships, men have fallen in love with me for the idea of being with a spiritual goddess who is perfect in every way, only to find that they are in a relationship with a real woman. [Blog still published]
Positive intention behind staying miserable, is to dump it on parents and boyfriend
In Teal’s blog, “Darkness or Absence of Light”, she believes the “positive intention” behind her misery, is to show and/or dump her “pain” onto her parents and boyfriend, punishing them for her feelings. She goes onto to state that everyone behaves this way (projection). Teal writes this for the World Wide Web to read, and her family to learn about it there. It is a guilt trip of epic proportions, and very manipulative. She teaches her followers that being in a state of victimhood is a good thing, and that it is everyone else’s fault, instead of teaching how to take responsibility for one’s own emotions, move through them, heal and be victorious. Many spiritual teachers provide tools to do this. What Teal does, is remind her followers how much better she is than them, because she believes she is the only one who is “authentic”.
I discovered that a part of me had been lying to myself. I had been saying that I wanted to feel better. But only one part of me wanted to feel better. I asked myself today ‘What bad thing will happen if I get happy?’ I asked myself this question to try to discover my positive intention behind staying miserable. The answer I found is that if I get happy and stay alive (do not commit suicide) then my parents will never know the depth of my pain. They, along with the world will remain forever oblivious to the depth of my pain and what was done to me. Fallon will also never grasp the gravity of how much he has hurt me. There seems to be no justice in life if they remain oblivious. It is a precious, backwards kind of thing that we do, when we try to create justice by virtue of furthering our own misery. It is difficult to discover that this is what you have been doing and not jump immediately to self-condemnation. It is difficult (but necessary) to find approval for having coped with pain in unhealthy ways that add to the pain instead of take away from it. [Blog still published]
Naming names, the “envious” card & cult red flag
Again, in Teal’s world, no one can confront her behavior. Instead, she gaslights and distorts the event into women being envious of her. Her followers read this, and if anyone questions her, the reaction is, “you’re just jealous of Teal“. This is all manipulation. Teal also includes a name of a person in this blog without their consent. Teal was prompted to not reference the person, and to edit her blog, “A Piece Of My Heart”. No one should have had to prompt her in the first place. Another telling aspect of this excerpt is that Teal is using the language common for a cult leader (“inner circle”).
“A rift formed between people in my inner circle who sided with me and people who sided with the woman I was asking to keep my distance from. Which is the exact dynamic that happens with people who ‘flip’ from avid fan to hater. They begin to play the victim and turn people against you, just like [redacted] did ( she is one of my principal haters now). From experience, I literally could have written the script for how this all went. A rift formed between people in my inner circle who sided with me and people who sided with the woman I was asking to keep my distance from. Which is the exact dynamic that happens with people who ‘flip’ from avid fan to hater. They begin to play the victim and turn people against you, just like [redacted] did ( [redacted] is one of my principal haters now). From experience, I literally could have written the script for how this all went.” [Blog still published] Redacted information.
My husband left me
In Teal’s blog, “Life Is Bigger Than Your Life“, she states, “. . . my husband left me to fly back to his home country.” She goes onto how stricken she with anxiety attacks, complete with a fair amount of melodrama. In Teal’s typical fashion, she moves onto advice-giving for her readers. In essence, Teal presents herself as a victim of her ex husband, and props herself as an authority on emotional healing, while selling her “Completion Process”. But what about Teal’s ex husband? She leaves him in the dust, while leading her followers to believe that he’s just some jerk that left for no good reason. Is this fair to him? Does Teal ever take responsibility for her half of the relationship failure?
Exactly one year ago today, my world turned black when after the relationship turned sour, my husband left me to fly back to his home country. I have been grappling with anxiety attacks since that day. I have always hated the name “anxiety attack”. It doesn’t come close to describing the condition. It trivializes the experience in fact. An anxiety attack is in fact the worst emotional experience a person can have. The universe at large becomes an invisible demon that sucks the air from your lungs. It bites into your chest and the poison it lets into your veins is doom. Doom crawls its way through every artery as if it had claws and with every inch, it rips you open to the degree that you feel as if you are bleeding internally. You feel as if you are being internally ripped open at the same time as being externally closed off. A person can usually feel the future ahead of them. But with an anxiety attack, you cannot. Instead of the present moment being a space of freedom from pain, it is a prison of pain. The future ceases to exist and you are stuck in a timeless, isolated purgatory with no promise of an end. [Blog still published]
Teal, the victim of being interviewed by a non-devotee
For years Teal has not been interviewed by formal media outlets. She has only been granting interviews to those who she knows are supporters, and “Tealers”. During 2017, her spiritual “career” as she puts it, turned a corner. The news media began to request interviews. Teal tested the waters with the Gaia interview during Spring of ’17. It was glaringly apparent that she was nervous (which leads one to question why she was so nervous). Teal’s inflections while she was recounting her ritual abuse story are very telling. And from the look of it, a rash broke out on her neck, and subsided when she realized the host was buying her storytelling. But then came the OZY interview during the Fall, and suddenly she was being questioned about the “red flags” that surround her. Teal wants to take the “world stage”, and be the “leader of the new age”, but how is it that she expects reputable news media to not ask pressing questions? She did not like the questioning one bit – she labeled it “antagonistic”. And to get a head start on spinning public perception, she blasted her blog, “Ratatouille” before OZY published their article, “Spiritual Guru or Dangerous Cult Leader?“. Here is an excerpt from Teal’s “damage control” blog:
“The style of this interview is not what I expected. There are two different styles of interview, one is supportive and the other is antagonistic. In a supportive style interview, you are already going into the interview being loved. The entire structure of the interview is set up to make you look good. In an antagonistic style interview, the majority of the focus is placed on challenging you. . . . In an antagonistic style interview, you spend your time trying to answer questions while simultaneously trying to caretake the vulnerable aspect of you that feels targeted and like hiding under a blanket while sucking its thumb. Sometimes the interviewer is already biased against you and is simply setting up the interview as a trap to make you look bad so their pre-conceived, concrete concept of you can then be shared by the world in order to make them feel personally validated.”
She was easily the most inept psychologist I have ever seen
In this blog, Teal takes the opportunity to harshly criticize a psychologist that she had a session with. Teal takes full advantage of the one-way confidentiality of the client/therapist relationship, to disparage the therapist’s competence, calling her “inept”, all because she didn’t comply with Teal’s expectations and tell her what she wanted to hear. Teal criticizes her for listening more than talking — something that is generally considered a sign of a competent therapist. Teal also takes objection to the therapist holding a pillow, yet it isn’t hard to imagine for those familiar with Teal’s attitude, why the therapist might have employed what was possibly protective body language. Teal was angered because, rather than offer advice on her relationships, the therapist suggested Teal would be “better off alone”. This actually sounds like sage advice given Teal’s disastrous relationship history and inability to stay single, but evidently Teal couldn’t handle hearing it.
Teal goes on to discredit every psychologist who has ever tried to help her. In her infinite arrogance, Teal suggests that nobody can help her because of “who [she] is” (an alleged “extrasensory” who thinks they know better than qualified therapists). According to Teal, the only advantage of having seen these therapists, is that their “failures” led to her creating her own “healing programs” and got her to “the place [she] is in today” (a con artist who pretends to be a therapist and healer). As Teal thinks all therapists are useless, and only she knows what’s best, she finds it “super frustrating when [she] would actually like that outside perspective”. But the psychologist did give her “outside perspective” when she suggested that Teal should stay single, Teal just didn’t like that perspective.
Teal must have known there was a chance that the psychologist, and/or her previous therapists, might read her blog. Perhaps that was her intention, to chastise them all for failing to sycophantically pander to her like the members of her “inner circle” do. But that’s not what a good therapist does or should do, it would only reinforce Teal’s issues. If that is what Teal demands, then it’s no wonder she goes from therapist to therapist and none of them have been able to help her. It’s not them, Teal, it’s you.
Yesterday, I ventured to see a new psychologist. She was easily the most inept psychologist I have ever seen. When I walked in the room, she picked up a pillow and held it between her and me the entire time we were talking. My case was far too much for her to handle. She had no suggestions whatsoever for me to employ. The very little that she did talk, she was so anxious about not knowing what to say that she stuttered. I could see that look of absolute bewilderment about what to do or say. I paid her purely because I wanted to avoid confronting her about how terrible the session was.
It was bad enough that I had to ask her guided questions about what she would say to someone like me relative to relationships. And she still couldn’t answer those questions. All she could say was that I am better off alone. It made me feel a lot worse. I can see that the extent of this woman’s career will be working with adolescents who are struggling with minor issues like not wanting to go to school or not being invited to prom.
It still didn’t save me from feeling really terrible about myself, like no one knows what to do for me. The problem in general with being who I am, is that it is very rare that someone suggests something I haven’t already thought of or tried 5 times over. And that is super frustrating when you would actually like that outside perspective. It makes me feel like I am alone. I get to crawl my way via trial and error through my problems one by one. Cause no one else knows what to do for me. This has been the story of my life. I have designed my own healing programs because no one else knew what the hell to tell me to do to help myself.
The psychologists, who have really helped me in the past, have not helped me as a byproduct of their intelligence, but rather from a place of having great tools to offer. I suppose it is as it should be, if it weren’t for their failures, I would not be in the place I am in today. I would not have realized that the information I have is valuable to the world. Anyway, last night in response to the severe anxiety caused by my visit to this psychologist, I decided to leave my body. Yes, it was a form of escape. And I have returned to an anxious body this morning. I spent the duration of the night deliberately in what I call the eleventh dimension. [Blog still published]
One half of the story
This following excerpt is from Teal’s blog, “Sunlight Through The Granite Gray”. It is yet another example of Teal presenting herself as the victim of some other person. Is it fair to the other person? Does she consider that the other might not want their private conversations shared with the entire world? Do her followers know the other half of the story? Of course not.
“Why did my ex husband decide I was impossible to be with just two weeks into the marriage and then leave me and say that his being ‘exhaled’ when he returned to London… so he knew he could not commit to me?” [Blog still published]
People who have anti social personality disorder make things about themselves
In Teal’s blog, “Shedding Ego’s Skin”, she writes about her ex boyfriend, Fallon’s [alleged] psychopathy… again. Was Teal projecting?
“I’m in a frustrating position, because my personal pain is so loud in this scenario, that my extrasensory gifts have taken a back seat. I want to believe him [Fallon]. And this explanation of his would reasonably explain his complete detachment from the seriousness of what he said that night. And people, who have anti social personality disorder, do always make things about themselves (I.e. tonight is about the group helping me to do a memory exercise to find out why I keep hurting Teal, vs. The group is trying to find out for themselves the real truth about why I keep hurting Teal).” [Blog still published]
Teal has often stated that she believes being “authentic” is “career suicide”. Perhaps, she should thwart it by not throwing people under the bus.
Closing with this. Teal states:
“In the beginning of my career I used to jump at the opportunity to address people’s grievances about me. I’d try to resolve the issue with people who made up their mind about me, slandered me on the internet or posted disapproving comments about me. Long story short, it was a short-lived endeavor. I discovered the hard way that not everyone enters into a conflict with the desire to re-connect and resolve the conflict.”